Monday, January 24


"Do you believe in God?"

A question that I simply answered with "Yes!", when I was 7.
It doesn't mean I don't believe in Him now, but.... yeah let's see.

When I was 6, I wanted a cooking toys. I was begging to my Mama for it. My parents bought me at the other day. Moreover, I got a sister from my mom! God is good.
When I was 7, I wanted to go to kindergarten. Gratefully my parents were able to pay me for school, uniforms, books, and all. I was going to school! I met my new friends and first childhood crush.
When I was 8, I started to feel disturbed by my little sister. All attentions were going to her. I cried a lot. I hate God. God was evil.
When I was 9, I wanted a puppy for my birthday. I got it from my Papa! I love God. God is good.
When I was 10, I was happily playing with my friends. Oh, I got a brother from my Mama! I'm proud! I'm the eldest among all!
When I was 12, I wanted x school for my junior high, because most of my friends went there. My mom didn't let me. So I was going to 'her preference' junior high. I felt sad. God's evil.
When I was 15, I wanted x school for my senior high. My dad didn't let me. So then I was going to 'his preference' senior high. Once again, God's evil.
When I was 17, I felt blessed. I had fabulous friends, boyfriend, and parents. My highest curve in my life. God is totally good.
When I was 18, I felt free! College life was so tempting with so many new challenges! Yet I miss my wonderful highschool friends. And yes, I realized that I went to the very best high school for me. God's fair :)

When I am 19 now, I am too selfish and I want everything.
Unfortunately, you won't have 'everything' in the real life. C'est la vie, kiddo.
He just made me lose something in my life.
Maybe that's the reason for me to go out from my comfort zone.
Maybe that's the reason I shall do something.
Maybe that's the best way to wake me up and stop wasting time.
Maybe that's the best way to start thinking about myself. Just myself & my future.
Maybe that's the reason so I will have the 'everything' in my life soon.

When I grow up, I realized that God gives what you want in a very different way unlike when you were a kid. In fact, He doesn't give all that you want. Imagine if God gave all His people's wants, I bet the world would be as chaos as in God Almighty film!
Apparently God gives us what we need, at the unpredictable time and with an unpredictable way, don't you think? ;)
I don't know but I start to think that everything happens in my life has its own purpose.
Maybe I won't realized now one by one, but sooner or later I know I will.

I believe God have His own way. Even sometimes I feel lost, I don't pray much, vice versa.
I do have my own way and will get along with His way.
I believe He has beautiful plans for everyone; so strive happily, stop jealousy, laugh crazily, and live your life to the fullest!
"In that I command thee this day to love the LORD thy God, to walk in his ways, and to keep his commandments and his statutes and his judgments, that thou mayest live and multiply: and the LORD thy God shall bless thee in the land whither thou goest to possess it."
-Deuteronomy 30:16

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